Last week I had quite a bad day — or rather, I had more than one — but since I’ve begun (in earnest, rather than in lip-service) the new, fancy nutrition program recommended by a client of mine, I’ve had some progress in both the mood and stamina, though the pain has continued marching on. The pain isn’t even the most of my problems; I find it possible to negotiate it as long as I have enough energy throughout the day to feel like (and actually) accomplish something every day that’s both worthwhile and can earn me the kind of money I need to earn to satisfy both my financial needs and my health needs simultaneously.
Granted that nothing is perfect, and sometimes my body can be annoyingly inconsistent, I am happy to report that over the last several days I’ve had more good days than bad as I trade my old diet (which had once again become pretty pedestrian due to how physically depressed I felt) for such treats as Himalania goji berries, TerrAmazon “nibs” with cocoa + Brazil Nuts + ground coffee in the mix, Kaia brand pumpkin seeds, Bio-K+ Probiotics, Fage Greek and Wallaby brand yogurts, Odwalla protein shakes (which, despite the sugar, are now a part of my diet that’s making me feel better), and finally, Tulsi Chai and Windor-brand coca tea (which, for me, has been a great replacement for most caffeinated beverages). I’ve also started with more organic meats and veggies, and today, rather than gobbling down a mountain of fries with my chicken nuggets, I asked the cook behind the counter to give me steamed vegetables instead.
I’m allowed one day a week to “slack” a bit on the diet, and that’s how I went about choosing the fried nuggets and steamed vegetables for my Sunday afternoon meal; I also had what I imagine will be the last of any high-fructose corn syrup drinks for a while, as they make my teeth feel sort of fonky, but I may spring for a Freddo if I have to spend many more hours working today. (I don’t like working on Sundays, but it’s the most prudent thing for my current work and medical schedule for the next few months.) According to my nutritionist, this kind of dieting (6 days on and one day off) is to keep me — wisely — from going absolutely crazy from abstinence, a factor that can make people blow their nutrition plans. as I’m in it for the long haul, I’m willing to treat one day a week as a “drunk all night” type day, one day a week that offers me the stamina to continue my path of self-control for the other 6 days. The last time I went on a diet, I counted calories by using my iPhone’s “LoseIt!” app and lost 30 lbs, which I’ve been able to keep off consistently. It lasted for about a year and 1/2 before I met my nutritionist, a woman who reversed many of her own fibromyalgia symptoms after a period of years.
My nutritionist is one of those rare people who saw/felt her bout with fibro coming and managed to beat it back with the stick of life; over the years I managed to do the same thing when fibro-like symptoms reared their hydra-like heads, but this latest bout with it nearly crushed me (it resulted from a back injury that kept me from exercising or doing much of anything useful for a while except work), and turning to pain, sleep, and wakefulness medication and therapies has been the only way I’ve been able to wrestle with this disorder effectively.
This time around, it has been here to stay, and the fact that I’m also dealing with some severe nerve pain in my right hip (it’s been here on and off for 2 decades) has made the problem ever more annoying, as my doctors have refused to look at my hip or tell me what might be wrong with it; the only treatment I ever had was a harrowing cortisol shot that made both the hip pain and my mood about 1,000 times worse; for a while, I couldn’t walk more than a block and 1/2 without severe pain, something that NEVER happened before I was shot full of cortical steroids by what looked to me to be a methed-up jackass in a lab coat (I think they fired that guy, but I’m not entirely sure). I’m not sure if it’s an insurance thing or what, but I’ve had to seek alternative therapies in order to heal whatever the mystery pain is. They usually work (as does the Dilaudid I’m now taking, hah hah).
The good news about Dilaudid is that it 1) works faster 2) contains no acetaminophen 3) is very tiny 4) works in totality for much longer periods of time, resulting in my taking far less medication overall and 5) doesn’t make me feel loopy, warm, or weird the way the vicodin did. Because of this last observation (#5) I’ve also been able to cut back on medication for wakefulness and tiredness; it’s as if my brain and body have a new lease on life that is slowly spreading to the rest of my work and play habits; I’m grateful for its existence, and it’s been a tremendous help where other doctors and drugs failed miserably. It gives me hope that my life will one day get completely back on track, pain and neuro bullshit be damned.
Cheers to all of you, and may you all find your own versions of healing for this terrible affliction. Blessed Be and take care.















